When frugality becomes foolishess

Clara has been growing like a weed and she is about out of her size 2 diapers. Though they seem big enough when I put them on her, their inability to provide the appropriate amount of containment suggests otherwise. Lately, if Clara dirties her diaper while I am holding her, it usually means that both she and I will require a change of clothes.

But, I persist on putting her in size 2 diapers. Why? Because I recently bought a gigantic box of them and I can't stand the idea of letting them go to waste. I paid for them so I want to use every single one of them!

As I was changing my clothes the other day after another Clara blow out, I laughed at myself at how absurd I was being. All of this inconvenience and mess over probably less than $10 worth of diapers. Was it really worth it? No, of course not. But did this realization change anything? Nope.

But, today I finally called "uncle". Clara filled her diaper to overflowing at the orthodontist while still sitting in her carseat. Her clothes and the carseat were completely soiled, I hadn't brought a change of clothes for her with me and, of course, the bathroom did not have a changing table. It took at least 15 minutes for me to clean up her, me and the carseat and she had to spend the rest of the appointment only wearing a diaper. I had to suppress my desire to explain to every new person that walked into the door that I am normally in the habit of actually dressing my children when they are out in public.

So, no more forcing Clara into too small diapers! It's high time I recognize when my being frugal is just being plain cheap.

Does anyone else have stories of when your frugality got the better of you?

It's been a little crazy around here...

I guess craziness is to be expected when there are 4 young kids in a house with the youngest being a newborn! :) Clara is a sweet baby and generally only cries when she's either hungry or needs a diaper change. She's awake in the daytime more every day so now we get to see her beautiful eyes. We all just stare at her and laugh at the funny faces she makes. Even though she is my fourth, I just marvel at how little she is. You really do forget what newborns are like!


Things got much more crazy around here when Eric had to leave town on Monday. He's a consultant engineer and when you're a consultant, you have to take work when you can get it. So, he is in western New York state right now fixing a forging press. I have to say, I wasn't too excited about him leaving for an unspecified amount of time when Clara was only 5 days old. But, thankfully, my mom was able to come into town this week to help me. She's a high school math teacher and missing the first week of the new semester is definitely not ideal. I'm so thankful that she made that sacrifice for me.


But, Mom has to go back today and we still don't know when Eric will be home. Every time I talk to him things change. He thought he would be able to come on Wednesday and then he thought he might come home today for a couple of days and then go back, then he thought he wouldn't be able to come home until next Sunday at the earliest.

I've been trying so hard to be strong and supportive of Eric and understanding of the pressure he is under and how hard it is to balance professional responsibilities with family life. At times I am amazed at what I am able to do and handle (thank you Lord for the graces!) and other times I feel like I'm going to crumble. I dread having to face this next week of lunchboxes, homework, round the clock nursing, laundry, a jealous 2 year old, getting out the door and to school on time and minor catastrophes alone. Without Mom here this week, I don't know how I would have dealt with the broken heater on the van, new bed bug bites (ugh!) or the geyser that erupted in our front yard from a broken water pipe.

I'm constantly reassuring everyone around me that I've got things covered; I can handle it. So many family members want to help, but they can't because of their own life obligations. I don't want them to worry or feel guilty about being unable to help, so I spout words of confidence and self-assurance when inside I really don't know if I can do this.

So, once again I'm asking for prayers. And, if any of you mothers who have to do this parenting-alone-thing often could spare a few words of wisdom or advice, it would be greatly appreciated!

A very different pregnancy

This pregnancy has been very different than any of the others. I'm not just talking about how I feel physically this time around, which has been a daily adventure, but my mental state has also been very different. I was trying to articulate the difference to Eric the other day when I said, "I completely aware that I'm pregnant, but I seem to forget that I'm having a baby."

Does that make any sense at all? I think life has been so insanely busy lately that I've hardly had the opportunity to relish the idea of a new baby. I can recite the litany of pregnancy symptoms that I have been dealing with, but I have barely given a moment's thought to names or godparents or what it will be like to hold a newborn once again. I feel guilty because I often forget that there is a child, a living soul, residing in my belly. In previous pregnancies, I was much more aware of the life growing within me (I'm now almost 17 weeks along).

I hope that these feelings will change soon. I'm now feeling Button move, which is a wonderful reminder of the baby in my belly. Also, I'm beginning to look forward to school starting again and our lives falling into more of a routine. I don't think we'll be any less busy, in fact as meetings and organizations begin again we will get even busier, but there will once again be a predictable rhythm to our days. I'll be able to look forward to quiet times in my day where I can think and plan, anticipate and pray. I think I just need to a little time to myself so that I can fall in love with this precious, new baby.

New nephew

Here's our newest addition to the family, Payne Daniel, my brother's first born son. I was able to be there for the birth (via c-section) and it was a wonderful experience. This was the first time that I was the one in the waiting room rather than the one giving birth. I think being in the waiting room is more nerve wracking!


But, we are so thankful for little Payne. Our family has so much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. We've had five new cousins born this year. Yes, it has been a very blessed year indeed!

More prayers please

UPDATE: The triplets are here! I don't have much information yet. My mother-in-law said that the babies are doing well but "Trio" is a little sluggish. I've got to stop thinking of them by their nicknames. They have real names now! Welcome to the world Gretchen, Michael & Charles! You are such a gift!!

Thank you all for your prayers for all of us affected by hurricane Ike. I am so thankful for all of you wonderful women!

I have another request for prayers today. My triplet nephews and niece will most likely be born today. At my sister-in-law's last couple of ultrasounds, they noticed that "Duo" is not growing like the others. Something is pinching his umbilical cord and limiting flow through it. They admitted my SIL to the hospital yesterday, were going to do one more ultrasound this morning, and, if nothing changes, the babies will be delivered this afternoon. She is currently at about 32 1/2 weeks gestation.

Please pray for their safe delivery, for the health of the babies and their mother, for the doctors and nurses, and for my brother-in-law (who happens to be a doctor as well) who has been under so much stress. I think being a doctor makes it much worse because he knows the details of every little thing that could go wrong.

Blessed Mother, please watch over and protect these precious babies! St. Gerard, St. Anne, St. Gianna, please pray for them!


Update: The babies should be born around 4 or 4:30 this afternoon!

Baby blue

He's growing way too fast!

Somehow he's already 13 months old. I don't know when that happened because we just celebrated his first birthday didn't we?
And, he took his first steps this weekend, and I didn't see it! But, Daddy did, and I'm glad that he got to experience that special first. Now I'm watching him like a hawk so I can catch his second steps.

And, Eric's convinced that Gustin is talking. Eric takes him outside all the time and they look at the birds. Gustin now says "Buh, buh," and points at the birds when he sees them. He's says "Buh, buh," a lot, though, so I don't know if it counts. When we were in Eric's hometown last, his mother was convinced that Gustin could say "puppy" and a brother-in-law claims that he said "squash". I don't know. I don't think any of these words will be going in Gustin's baby book.

Baby Pink

My kids' first cousin should be making her debut any time now. I'm so excited because baby Carley's arrival will make me an aunt! Aunt Colleen. I like it.

Babies Pink and Blue

We found out that the triplets that Eric's brother and sister-in-law are expecting are two boys and a girl. Isn't that wonderful? A mix! I guess we should now call them Una, Duo and Trio.

Happy Monday!

And, we're back!

We just got home from our second trip to Eric's hometown in the last three weekends. The first trip was for a baby shower for Eric's sister who is expecting at the end of June. We are so excited because her little girl will be my kids' first cousin (Eric and I are both the oldest in our families and we were the first to get married). It's so fun to watch Eric's sister. She does things and says things that I know I did when I was expecting my first. She is so clueless, just like I was. No matter how much you prepare, there is know way of knowing what it's like to be a mom until you are one. I'm so glad that God invented motherhood!

This weekend we were back in Eric's hometown, this time for a baby shower for his brother's wife. And, they are expecting triplets! Now, that is a whole different deal. I am still completely awestruck by the whole situation. Eric's sister-in-law looks like she's about 6 months pregnant, but she's only three and a half. She felt the babies move for the first time the other day but it was painful, which scared her and she ended up going to the emergency room. Everything about her pregnancy is different than anything I've ever experienced. Any prayers for them would be very much appreciated. Their goal is to make it to 32 weeks. Wow! I really can't imagine. They call the babies Uno, Duo, and Trio. Every night the kids pray for their cousins by name. It's so cute.

Also, my brother and his wife are expecting and are about three months along. Soon we are going to have babies everywhere! This is going to be such a big year for our families. A big year of blessings!

I love...

I loved Jill's list of things she loves, so I thought I would add a few of my own.

I love...

The way that my 5 year old, three year old and five month old all stretch the same way when they wake up. The type of stretch where they kick their legs out straight and stretch all the way down to their toes.

The way that baby's toes are constantly in motion.

The first ever picture day at school.

Elizabeth pushing her cars around in a baby doll stroller.

The way toddlers sing to themselves while they play. Singing the right words is optional.

The fuzzy soft baby hair that grows after all the newborn hair falls out. Snuggling that little head against your cheek is the best.

A silent house after all the kids have fallen asleep. We're going on 20 minutes straight and the baby is still asleep!

UPDATE: Gustin woke up at minute 27. But, those 27 minutes sure were bliss!

Poop Phobe

As in someone who has a phobia for or fear of poop. That describes my husband. Well, that's not completely fair. He does a great job of changing diapers or cleaning up after the dog. No, his fear is a very specific one. He only freaks out when it involves breastfed baby poop that has leaked out of a diaper onto his hand, shirt, arm, pants, etc. Then my farm-raised, tough, country boy husband absolutely freaks out and almost throws the said leaky-diaper baby at me as he sprints to the closest decontamination zone.

Now me, I frequently go all day long with yellow breastfed baby poop stains on my clothing and poop on my hands, arms, etc. rarely elicits more than a sigh. It's a good thing that men are not mothers!

I've always wondered...

What do babies dream about? For a few minutes after Gustin falls asleep he has a series of smiles that flit across his chubby face. What do you dream about when you don't understand language, don't yet see very well, and don't even realize that those things you keep sticking in your mouth are your own hands? I think that half the time he dreams about nursing since often his little tongue is sucking against the roof of his mouth. Or maybe he just dreams in feelings; warmth, love, softness, closeness. What wonderful things to dream about...