Does anyone else have a problem with comparing yourself with other women? I know I cannot be alone in this. I'm horrible about obsessing about the laundry list of things that this friend or that friend is able to accomplish while I can't seem to manage a fraction of those things. Eric gets on to me all the time that I need to stop comparing myself with other people. But, it's hard to turn off those voices in your head, ya know?
So, I've been trying to come up with things that I can tell my self to help me try to stop this pointless behavior. First, I remember my husband's great advice that I'm not supposed to compare my insides to other people's outsides. I also remind myself that these other moms don't have more hours in the day than I do. So for them to get all these things done, there must be plenty of other things that don't get done. Those other things are probably some of the things that I do well. Then I remind myself of all the things that I am good at.
To get a complete picture of any person, you have to understand both the things that they excel at as well as their weaknesses. On blogs we tend to put only our best "out there" for everyone to see. I would never want another woman to feel inferior because she only reads on my blog about my accomplishments. I'm highly flawed and would never want anyone to think I am not.
As a reminder to myself, and as an encouragement to any other of you women who are out there struggling, here's a look at what I'm good at and bad at.
I'm good at:
Cooking/feeding my family nutritious meals
Photography
Reading with my children/ teaching them to love books
Doing a task thoroughly
Listening to others
Making time daily to spend with my husband
Making time daily to pray
Gardening
Keeping track of the family finances
Nurturing my children
Reading (I love to learn new things!)
Disciplining my children
Working off a task list
Not spending money frivolously
I'm bad (more like horrible) at:
Keeping my house/car/desk/counter tops/pretty much anything tidy
Dishes
Cleaning in general
Organizing
Getting stressed out over details
Inviting people over for dinner (because my house is always a mess)
Shopping
Scrapbooking/recording my children's childhood
Crafting
Printing/framing/hanging the pictures I take
Getting to know people
Returning phone calls
Being spontaneous
Blogging regularly :)
I'm sure there are more things in both of these categories, but that's what I can come up with for now in the sliver of time between supper and bath time.
Does anyone else want to share? Please feel free to leave your own good at/bad at list in the comments or let me know if you do a similar type post on your own blog!
3 comments:
I'll have to think on this. I'm afraid I'd have a hard time making my lists equal...I'm a very good self-critic!
What I notice about your lists are that you have so many good "lasting" things like quality time with family, prayer time, listening, and reading. And I would so love to be good at the cooking healthily and budgeting part of this vocation!
You are doing a great job, Colleen. Hope you guys have a wonderful summer!
Thank you, Blair! You are so sweet.
Actually, I really figured my "bad at" list would be much longer, too. My weaknesses just seem so in my face all the time. But, when I started to think about it, I had to admit to myself that there really are a number of things that I do well. Now looking at that list really does make me feel better about how well I'm living out my vocation. I still have a lot of room for improvement, but I'm definitely not a complete failure (even though I can often think that I am)!
I do wonder how it would have gone, though, if I had done this exercise when I was going through post partum depression. I wonder if it would have helped or, more likely, I bet I would not have been able to come up with many good things.
Great post. I have always made these two lists in my head...I should type them out someday. :)
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